And, Your Boss Will Be … God!?

Yes, I have been flickering through job posts as a habit now. It is sort of addiction of self-actualization in a tangible form. I am just obsessed in seeing if my ethics, experiences and qualification match the market needs of some sort. Some other reasons are a little less than exploratory.

Suddenly, I realized that most of the job ads are either overstated or daunting piece of crap derived from the ego of the person who wrote the job ads. Some time I even wonder if such qualified persons could really be entitled ‘Super Employee’ for the sake of his/her specialty. And probably that ‘Super Employee’ may only have a direct report to God. Should no mortals are allowed to evaluate, pay-raise, instruct the ‘Super Employee’ whatsoever.

Look at this opening in searching for a ‘Super Employee’ from a well-known company:

>>University graduate in Computer Engineering, Computer Science or a related field.
>>A few years of experience in a related technical role; some experience in managing team with a sound understanding of Company A staff management processes would be an advantage.
>>Possessing the following key technical knowledge and skills:-
>>UNIX systems, Sun Solaris, Linux and Microsoft Windows Server family
>>TCP-IP networking
>>Knowledge and experience in Company A Products and Solutions is preferred
>>Working Knowledge of Databases and RDBMs
>>Very good knowledge and understanding of end-to-end problem escalation processes.
>>Sound Awareness of customer environments and Field support work.
>>Excellent verbal and written English skills.
>>Multi-tasking and able to prioritize workload and manage time effectively.
>>Able to work as part of a team.
>>Sound analytical, problem solving and communication skills.
>>Some Financial Market awareness is useful.

Believe me, Company A is real.

They probably are looking for an engineer/programmer who know every single computer operating system in this planet and gotta be excellent in English as well. They, Company A, even expect candidates, who most of them I believe barely worked for Company A before, to possess Company A’s bloody staff management process knowledge.

What on earth a prospect would know Company A staff management processes !! Either he/she used to reincarnate into a Company A employee, ex-employee or office-stalker who has been snooping around this company for quite some time, ain’t he?

I submit to you that this dream employee must be a Computer Engineering graduate who took Finance as minor during academic year and went to a MBA school and had been working for Oracle for some time then he/she decided to explore his career in Marketing Communication, aboard. Having at least three PC’s at home which are installed with Solaris, Unix and Windows just for fun.

Moreover, this candidate must be accustomed to Company A product already and has a very very excellent understanding of Company A’s customer behavior through and through, as well.

…

Imagine that.

Imagine if this ‘Super Employee’ does really exist, if not a liar, his direct report could only be God himself.